An Excerpt From A Diary

Sometimes I think it’s easier to just feel like this. To not have to exert as much effort being happy all the time, to just feel what I feel because I feel like feeling this way. I sometimes refer to it, begrudgingly, as my comfort blanket.

But other times, I wish I wasn’t like this. On those days when everybody’s feeling great and getting along, for no reason at all I find I can’t swim along to their tide. It breaks my heart to be an outsider to all that, to have to look through a glass window on all that I could have had if only I weren’t so…detached.

I’m allowing myself to be sad, to be human, today. When tomorrow comes, I’m going to forget that I wrote this in here. I dislike making my thoughts public, but sometimes i can’t help myself.